POO POO JUICE CHRONICLES

Once upon a time, a tenant called in a panic: water was overflowing in his basement backyard. (Day 0)

Day 1. Broker booked the owner’s trusted plumber (Plumber 1). Diagnosis: water pump + backup pump probably died. They agreed on a Day 4 visit.

Day 2. Plumber 1 suddenly asked the owner to send P9K for a submersible pump—plus another P9K to siphon the tanks. Broker checked online and found the exact same pump at 50% off, so he bought it himself. He also learned the siphoning service normally costs only P5K. Broker informed Plumber 1 that they’d handle both purchases and the siphoning on their own.

Day 3. Broker reminded Plumber 1 of tomorrow’s schedule. He confirmed.

Day 4. Plumber 1 vanished. Didn’t show up, didn’t answer calls. Broker tried calling using a different number—Plumber 1 picked up instantly. Meaning… yes, he blocked the broker. He ranted about the schedule and even threatened to “look for another plumber” if they couldn’t follow his time.

Broker immediately booked a siphon company for Day 6 and a new plumber (Plumber 2) to handle pump replacement after the tanks were emptied.

Day 6. Siphon truck ghosted them. Plumber 2 arrived, but with full tanks, he couldn’t do anything. Siphon company claimed their truck “broke down”… 2 hours after the appointment. They were reminded twice that day.

Broker still paid Plumber 2 for waiting.

Day 7. Broker scrambled for another siphon company + another plumber. Hard to sync schedules.

Day 9. Tenant found a siphon company who could come ASAP. Tanks were emptied.

Day 10. Broker booked Plumber 3. Problem: he couldn’t open the second septic tank hatch (where the pump was). The lids were cemented shut.

Day 11. Plumber 3 returned with reinforcements. They finally cracked open both lids… only to find the tanks full again. They started siphoning manually, and because they didn’t have a truck, the “poo-poo juice” had to go straight into the street drainage. At one point, it even sprayed back onto their faces. Neighbors complained about the smell. Work stopped.

Day 12. Finally, a proper siphon truck came. Tanks were drained (again). Plumber 3 replaced the pump. Crisis resolved.

***

Here's what the septic tank saga actually teaches us...

1. Expect “Filipino Time”—Prepare Like a General

In the world of home repairs, schedules are merely suggestions. Many service providers won’t show up, won’t text, and won’t apologize.

So the rule is simple: always double-book when it's an emergency and there’s no deposit required.

If the first contractor magically appears, cancel the second.

If not, you’re covered—and you’ve avoided 48 hours of overflowing chaos.

And when the work requires highly specialized skills (like siphoning a septic tank), be ready to pay a premium. The only thing more expensive than the service is the damage caused by poo-poo juice entering the property.

2. A Red Flag Is Still a Red Flag—even if He’s “the usual guy.”

Plumber 1’s personality was already screaming “future problem” the first time he worked on another project: constant complaints, victim mentality, the “mali sila, tama ako” vibe.

People like that almost always take their frustrations out on someone eventually.

This ordeal was the receipt.

3. For Brokers: House rentals pay more…because they punish more

Yes, the commission is higher than condos.

But so are the surprises, emergencies, out-of-nowhere breakdowns, and “my backyard's overflowing” calls.

Bigger rewards = bigger headaches.

4. Property Management = Real Estate Trench Warfare

NO ONE wants to do property management—neither brokers nor owners.

It’s messy, stressful, and full of unglamorous tasks.

But this is where brokers differentiate themselves.

Not by passing messages from the tenant to the owner… but by solving the mess others refuse to touch.

That’s real value creation.